About twenty minutes into being engaged, the following warning popped into my head:
“Whatever happens in the next few months–no matter how stressful or how crucial the situation may seem–don’t ever ever EVER become an over-obsessed bridezilla.”
Of course being the sweet, newly engaged bride-to-be, I never dreamt that thought would henceforward follow me many months after. But I am here to share that avoiding bridezilla symptoms is an harder task than you think.
I’ve become quite bipolar when it comes to the wedding budget. One moment I think, “Oh let’s just spend a little more and hire a band! What’s $500 more? It’s our wedding! When are we going to have the chance to have all of our close friends and family members together again??” And then the very next moment, I find out that the wedding favor we chose will require an additional $15 for ribbons and I freeeeeeeeeeak out and transform into the cheapest penny pincher east of the Mississippi and accuse this wedding as the beginning of a lifetime in debt. (Seriously? I’m crazy.)
Ever since I bought my wedding dress, I’ve been consumed with having the perfect body for the big day. In fact, I think I’ve only gained weight since then. The only practical time I can exercise is in the morning. I try to get up at 6:00 to workout, then wake up at 7:30 feeling fat and frustrated when I realize I snoozed for the past two hours. And I try to eat well and go on ridiculous no-anything diets, then get so upset when I partake in a company-provided lunch. I want to look my very best but each day that passes I just feel worse about appearance.
I really wanted to have amazing engagement photos. Like the kind of amazing photos where a couple will actually transport an entire vintage wardrobe into a wilderness. (If you frequent this blog, you know what kind of amazing I’m talking about.) We scheduled our photos for last weekend but it was one of those work weeks when I never saw daylight except from the office windows, and even when I did come home, my dreams were in spreadsheets. So when Friday rolled around, I scrambled and made a list of all of the food, supplies, props, and different outfits I needed to create the greatest engagement shoot ever. It had balloons, books, picnics, signs, chalkboards, three outfits, three pairs of shoes, and three locations. I was so frazzled about getting it all together. (Remember, this was also the week that I went to grocery store four times.) I finally snapped at J when he asked why he had to bring two different pair of shoes. Then he told me, in the sweetest way possible, that I was on the brink of being a bridezilla. Just the word silenced me and put everything into perspective.
The truth is, the next day was perfect. We ended up staying at just one place–the park J took me on my postponed proposal day. And I needn’t obsess over my weight. As much as I would like to weigh less, the truth is if I got married today I’d look gorgeous in that dress, because the dress is that pretty. I just need to relax and work on being healthy the healthy way. And whether we spend $5,000 or $25,000, we will be just as married. Sometimes a girl just has to relax, chill out, and enjoy this special, rare moment in life.
Any recent brides have any suggestions on how to avoid and silence your inner-bridezilla? :)