Last weekend when I was in Greensboro I stopped at that spot that I hadn’t been to in almost four years.
It was May 25, 2008.
I told him to meet me at 11:30 at the Triad Farmer’s Market on the Sandy Ridge exit. I wore a black eyelit dress with a pink ribbon around the waist. He wore a t-shirt and khaki shorts. I was waiting for him with a blanket and a picnic basket of chicken salad, Pringles, apples, and cookies that later melted in the sun. We drove around, looking for a quiet spot to have a picnic, and found a rec center down the road from the farmer’s market.
We ate and talked on the blanket talking for hours. A group of kids came to throw the ball in the baseball field next to our patch of grass. I don’t know why or who brought it up, but suddenly we were talking about kissing and I became the most awkward girl alive. I kept fidgeting and giggling and it’s a little embarrassing to think of how silly I was back then.
Next thing I know, he leaned over and we had our first kiss. My first kiss ever, actually.
When I was single, I would sometimes read Song of Solomon to gain some wisdom on relationships. I always found it strange that the girl in the book urges women three different times not to awaken love until the time is right. When a message is repeated in Hebrew, it’s something serious the writer wants to get across. I remember thinking, when do you know if the time is right? How will I know if he’s the one? What does that mean for my life? So many uncertainties.
I can’t answer those questions for you now, those are answers you have to find on your own journey. But I give the same plea as the author does:
“I adjure you, O daughter of the world, do not stir up or awaken love until it pleases.”
Because believe me, once you find that love, it will be worth it.
PS – See Song of Solomon 1:7, 3:5, 8:4